I Have the Small Talk Abilities of Clousseau from Pink Panther

ah! literally feels like i just wrote to yall! thanks again for the emails, but im afraid you´re mistaken: 

i am NOT limited on time to read! we print emails every week! 

1 peso a page! 8pesos = 1dollar and i read the emails all day long! hahaha enserio. all day long. hahaha we´re only allowed to read/write letters on monday, so i read and reread yalls letters! 

FALSE DOCTRINE THAT I'M LIMITED ON TIME! 

WRITE YOUR LITTLE HEARTS OUT ALL OF YOU! hahaha seriously though! i love them!!!! 

write me like its your job! [see sidebar of the blog]

as yall know, i cant wait and so the only waiting i do is i dont read them until were back at the pension (living quarters) and then i INDULGE i read and reread! hahaha 

and then i try to explain to hna musmano why I'm laughing--

like at that thing with pobrecita maddy and her chiggers! haha i was like, "ITS FUNNY CUZ SHE ITCHES! BUGS!" 
needless to say, the message didn't translate well, bahahaa 

but my spanish is coming along. i haven't heard english in so long it's weird! and i kind of think in spanish so that's bomb! whoever said ´´if you want to hear english yuou have to speak it yourself was CORRECT! hahaha but tis fun!

anyway this week! so good! difficult! this area really is hard. if we´re being honest. our president de mision said so too! 

BUT VAMOS A VER MILAGROS! 

hna musmano said something really powerful and perfect: ´´some missionaries are put in people´s lives to plant seeds and some are there to harvest´´

i know i can and will do both with the help of God, but right now we´re doing some mean plantin'! 

haha one day i got a wee bit down. last monday actually, then i started singing papou´s,

 WHATS A MATTA YOU EH! GOTTA NO RESPECT EH! WHADDAYA THINK YA DO? WHY YA LOOKA SO SAD? ITS A NOT SO BAD, ITS A NICE A PLACE,

OH SHUDDUP A YO FACE!!! 

so papou, if you read these, thank you! and i love you and miss you! 
(you should post a clip of that song on my blog haha)

anyway, never fear! i was not down for long, cuz like that one 90s song with the whacko chorus, 

´´I GET KNOCKED DOWN, I GET UP AGAIN, 

AINT NEVER GONNA KEEP ME DOWN!´´ 

repeat until you feel better. hahaha

first of all! i have SUCH a strong testimony of revelation while reading the scriptures its insane! its like everytime i study, its like 
BAM THIS IS FOR YOU! or BAM THIS WILL COME IN HANDY LATER WITH AN INVESTIGATOR! 
i love it!!! 
I LOVE THE BOOK OF MORMON!! so yeah, we had suchhhh a good study time and so many things came in handy later that day. also, i was teaching a lot! we did a good job switching off and ah i love the feeling after a lesson! soooo satisfying!!! but yeah theyre teaching this girl, she´s 14 and her she wants to be baptized sooo bad and she carries her book of mormon everywhere and reads it all the time its the greatest! anyway, she accepted a fecha earlier and this day she was going to talk to her mom, who was really against the whole thing and the church. anyway, she was super nervous, like shaking. but we said a prayer with her then went to talk to her mom. and ended up teaching the first lesson with her mom!!! 

AND SHE WAS LIKE, I LOVE THIS AND I'D LIKE YOU YALL TO COME BACK AND TEACH MY WHOLE FAMILY! so obviously, we got the permission from her and it was sooo coooL! full-fledged MILAGRO [miracle]!! 

while i was on splits, hna musmano and the other hna found this family! a mom, and two daughters around 20! and first lesson the accepted FECHAS!! how sick!!! ah! so that is the coolest thing ever!! 

AND THEY ARE THE FIRST TO ACCEPT 
A BOOK OF MORMON IN OUR AREA 
THE ENTIRE TIME THAT 

HNA MUSMANO HAS BEEN HERE! 
(3 or 4 months) 

loco, no??

anyway oh! i have a date for returning!!!! november 3 2k15!! already seems too soon, but there you go! and cheers, familia cuz i wont miss Christmas twice :)

OH GUESS WHAT I FOUND OUT! hahahaha the word for ´´chew´´ in spanish is MASTICAR! hahaha,

 ´´half-masticated cow rolling around in your wide open TRAP!´´ 

NAME THAT MOVIE! hahaha miss congeniality!! agh! 

also, me and hna musmano bonded over the movie parent trap! haha in spanish it´s called ´´El Juego de Gemelas¨ or 

the twin game hahaha too sick, right!!

also the music here is hilarious but guess who i can't escape? pharrell and his song ´´happy´´ its played all the time!!! ahhhh youd think id be far enough away!! hahaha

oh the game! LA COPA DEL MUNDO! [World Cup]

also VAMOS ARGENTINA!! fue ayer! ah! too bad we lost but AR-GEN-TINA AR-GEN-TINA!

yeah fue LOCO! we were told not to leave the apartment after 3:30 yesterday. so we had a lot of time to study and stuff. i wanted to get out there though cuz it was such a gorgeous day! it has been sooo cold! but these last two days its been GLORIOUS! PRIMAVERA EN MI ALMA HAY! hahaha anyway, yeah it would've been way crazier if we'd won, but todavía, it was loco outside! everyone was already drunk, so they were just going crazy out there fiestaing and playing futbol and launching fireworks that they'd already bought --it was insane!!!'

but anyway, this week was great! ah i love everything! oh also hna musmano needed something for her stomach cuz it as hurting and so i gave her tums but SHE LOVES THEM! she was like where do you get these! how much to they cost! she was going to town on my tums and so i had to hide them!! bhahaha

so mom, i relate to you cuz i was sick this week too! 

but never fear! the elders gave me a blessing on sabado and im all good now! 

hna musmano is the greatest caretaker ever bahaha shes from buenos aires obviously and the way she describes it and the way she is, it sounds like buenos aires is the new york of argentina. so she´s very short tempered and impatient (but in  a good way) like for instance i was sleeping and woke up to the smell of breakfast! (breakfast isnt a big thing here. siempre tea and crumpets hahaha) and so i go over to the cocina and hna musmano looks like shes about to kill something and im like ah! what is this! and she´s like "PANCEKES PARA USTED! COMO GRINGA!"

 hahaha but she doesnt know how to make them, so they were floppng everywhere and burning cuz she couldnt flip em and so she was stabbing them with a spatula cuz the middle woulndt cook--it was hilarious needless to say haha! 

OH! ew! so me and hna musmano were home cuz i felt horrible and we called the other hermanas and were like, ¨do yall have a thermometer¨ and hna roa was like yeah! and so i put it in my mouth for like 5 minutes. no idea how it works. so we gave up. LATER hna roa has me use it and its AN ARMPIT THERMOMETER! #ew #sicknast #sicknast 5mil!!! agh! 

how gross, no!!! hahaha 

well. ya win some, ya lose some. haha

OH! and did yall know that toms are from argentina! they totally have an argentina flag on them and come with a flag... 

i feel tanta for not knowing that hahaha

oh mom! did you know that president thomas s monson was the mission presdient of toronto canada??? google when! how sick is that!!!! i was like SHOUT OUT TO MY MOMMA! hhahah too legit!!!

i realize that i keep on forgetting to actually respond to yalls comments. so shellfish. lo siento. 
[insert overheard seafood joke here]

SELFIE TIME

me infront of our living quarters! hahaha why so awkward! haha it as supposed to be like a oo looky here! but its kinda like ´´is this where i live?´´

oh yesterday! we had the best empanadas ever!!! this family cooked a billion and six! i literally had stacks on stacks of empanadas! and not the highly popularized version of the word ¨literally¨where you're just really excited and feel like misusing a word--no! like i LITERALLY HAD STACKS ON STACKS OF EMPANADAS! RICO A FUL! AH loveeee ittt!!!!

but yeah, the work is great. my spanish is getting there. i have the small talk abilities of clousseau from pink panther... ´´lovely weather we are having.. 

i hope that the weather will continue´´´

bahaha enserio i say that all the time!
 love you all!

bon o bons are the greatest candy in the world. i would have a hard time trading my kidnapped husband for my case of bon o bons 

love you all more than i love bon o bons.. maybe! ahhaa familias pueden ser eterna! Jesucristo vive, porque de Su Expiación, podemos volver a Su presencia.

i love you all with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns

paz y bendiciones

ciaocito!!!!

hna dascanio

Cool Runnings

Well! this week was by far the fastest! ay yay yay!

so! boy oh boy where do i start!! this weeek was really good! a little difficult, but nothing can stop us!!! this area is apparentyly a little difficultand nonreceptive, but im not listening to that cuz WE WILL SEE MIRACLES!! 

patricia is still waiting on her casamiento, which is kinda sad, but hey! maybe she needs the time or its a test of patience or something! her boy, joel, already had a bautismo fecha but he wasnt completely on board, and so wewere like, well pray for yourself to know and he was liike i tried! and so boy i prayedfor him a whole bunch  and it was really cool cuz in the lesson i was like well its kinda like talking to a friend, it actually is!,and you need to wait to see what they say before you leave. kinda like that one kid said in church back home, recuerde? anyway, our next lesson with them was so good! we asked him if he had received an answer and were kind of bracing ourselves for another no (shame on us!)andhe was like yes! hes 10 by the way! and we were like ah yay! AND WHAT ANSWER DID YOU GET! AND he was like THAT ITS TRUE! THIS IS THE TRUE CHURCH! ah so good! so many good things!!!! me encanta la misión! 

sometimes im writing in my journal or on here andi cant think of the ingles word and so sorry hahaha but thats a good thing, no? hahaha i would say that i understand a little more, but i would probably comparemy speech to... trying to talk to a 2 yr old on skype: all my answers are really lagged and sometimesi just look at you and i do alot of smiles hahaha but its all good!! hahaha its fun! 

oh my! and EVERYONE LOVES TO SHOW ME THEIR ENGLISH! hahaha its sooofunny! like well be walking and some little kids playing fútbol will be like: hi ho er oo! [hi how are you] thats as best as i can explain it on the keyboard hahaha oh and everyone is so flattering haahhaa like were just walking down the streets of salta and (there are people playing fútbol everywhere, all ages) and theyll just be like ¨I LOVE  YOU HERMANA¨ THERE they go again with the english hahaha and

im just like shooot heres a book of mormon for you! bahahaha and people are all ways whistling at us bahaha im like shoot you want the gospel come and get it! hahah chiste! nah its really funny though! 

OH YEAH! im in salta! tribuno,salta,argentina! and its really sweet! i love it! ill try to send a picture of the view from our

place. were not supposed to be tourists and bring our camera with us, or have it visible to the public eye...  so sorry for the

lack of picture (WHAT MOVIE!! IF YOU DONT KNOW YOURE DEAD TO ME!)HAHAH jk miss congeniality! ¨¨i recognized you from your lack of picture!¨¨ bahaha Oh yeah! salta! sorry! so yeah salta is bomb! if you wanna know what it looks like, watch the beginning of Inception. is that argentina at the beginning? i think so... anyway it looks like that! 

ahh this keyboard will be the death of me. my fingers literally hurt from how hard im hitting the keys! agh!! hahaha also i formally apologize for the horrendous spelling and grammar. aint nobody got time for dat! ahahhaa 

so everyone in argentina is like up to my shoulder. i wish that were an exaggeration bahahaha talk about Big Person Little World bahahaha haha shout out laura and your favorite midget show! bahahaha but seriosusly! all the trees are also really low but everyone just walks under them just fine (like on the sidewalk) and im like ducking every 20 feet! hahaha also i need to figure out how tall i am in centimeters cuz i have 0 idea #woops 

oh my goodness! the KEYS! LA LLAVES! the keys here are all like old fashioned keys [skeleton keys] like moms old key on her car key doobop! its the coolest thing ever! and so el obispo, the bishop, has like a million right, and so he looks like dadgum the sheriff of nottingham with his key ring! ITS THE COOOLEST THING EVER! hahaha 

oh and HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!! i forgot about it! how unpatriotic! ah! but we had a zone conference on that day and so one of the other missionaires from los Estadus Unidos told me happy 4th and i was like oh hot dang! lookey there! haha 

also did yall read alma 26 when i told you to! betta have! hahah too good right! ahh i love el libro de mormón! also i put pictures of the fam in there and so its bomb! i showed one family, theyre less active, i forget why families got brought up but i was like oh i have my family right here and they the wife was like ah!!! CHIQUITITOS!!! (lilly and nick) she marveled at them for a solid 3 minutes hahah  especially niko! hahaha cuz like chiquito is like small,right and so chiquitito is like tiny like oh so cute litlle chiquitito! i should have counted how many times she said chiquitito! bahahah 

rosita chaquita wonita chihuahua 

oh yeah! we have a new presidente de misión! hes awesome! at the zone conference we met him and his family! love them ya!  

oh! and ya (pronounced sha) is everyone in argentina´s favorite word! its like means: over here, this way, already, go,

ANYTHING! like hna musmano is always like ¨¨vamos para ya¨¨ or ¨¨no es más para ya¨¨ hahhaa too funny 

i love hymns in spanish!  oh also TODAY IS 2 MONTHS ON THE MISH! can you believe that! SCARY!!! 

oh story time! so we had just finished a lovely lesson with belen and her mom, belma(they are bomb btw but they didnt go to church! ah!) but anyway and so we were un poquitito tarde. which is fine if you were in a lesson, but we wanted to run back cuz funsies right and so were liike light jogging and this 

EVIL DOG COMES barreling around the corner and is chasing us! not us, ME! 

and i was like WAHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

and so i start high tailin it like, straight bookin it, like my adrenaline was pumpin 

and i was runnin like a jamaican. 

just call me usain bolt! 

hahaha and then the dog GOT ME AND I WAS LIKE im not going down like this perro!!!! 

and so he had my skirt and i kicked my leg back at him and he let go and so i start booking it otra vez, only to realize that my shoe was off (curse you tiny tim the baby foot!) hahaha 

and so were like 30 feet away and i was like HERMANA AYUDAME! TIENE MI ZAPATO!!! 

and she was like no its fine, lets go! and i was like NOI NEED MY SHOE! 

AND she bucked up and tip toed towards the dog, got my shoe and we ran off hahaha how CRAYYYY!!!! ay hay hay! and i wasnt hurt at all! all i can say is that God is watching out for us for sure and garments really are a protector! 

like for real! it didnt get to my skin! how awesome! 

well, i love you all. 

know that i am well. todo bien! 

eatin pasta like a boss hahaha and loving it! 

the work is great. the work is His and AHHH I LOVE IT ALL!!

PAZ Y BENDICIONES

HNA DASCANO

I Speak Like a 2-year-old with 3 Marshmallows in its Mouth

OH BOY! this is gonna be awesome!

so i realized like right after i was done writing that i hadnt hardly said anything about how Argentina is and HELLO THE WORK! hahahaha woops! i was like WAH! also more pics are coming for sure! so here we go! 

I think this might be her neighborhood or area of town--not sure, haha

Argentina is AWESOME! the people! the place! the food! soo awesome all of it! the food is a very not mexican hahaha lots of noodles, lots of rice. LOTS OF CHICKEN! and french bread with everything! like EVERYTHING! entonces, stacks on stacks of carbs ´´id eat carbs if an italian boy bought them for me´´ NAME THAT MOVIE! hhaha lizzie mcguire! bahaha basically thats how it is! so awesome though i love it! our apartment is nice. we have a shower! the floor is sicknast all the time and i dont know why. its tile and i sweep it like 34 times a day. oh well. tis vida hahaa lets just say that those 4dollar flip flops from walmart are the greatest thing to happen to me! bahaha our apartment doesnt have heating or airconditioning, but its all good! we have tons of blanks and little estufas which are like baby heaters! im in love with the estufas! ill send a pic of me hugging one bahaha but its all good! 

hermana musmano is great! so patient! hahaha i teach her ingles and she obvi teaches me spanish. i only help her with ingles during estudiar idioma. she has to study english. which basically means that i write down funny things for her to say and translate primary songs and hymns! 

OH MY THE SONGS I FORGOT TO TELL YALL!!! AH! hahahah okay so we´re allowed to listen to music and apparently the apartment that we´re living in has been the missionary apartment forever and so theres this cd that belongs to the apartment and it has 8 songs-in

english. let me tell you what they are. 

• a pop version of Saturday is a special day 
• david archuleta´s version of True Colors
• a piano version of These are a few of my favorite things
• mormon tabernacle choir'sTeach me to walk in the light 
• and then theres a few that i didn't know before :)

so heres the hermanas in my apartment: 

• mi compañera, Hermana Musmano (no english) from buenos aires
• Hermana Villacis (nicest and cutest little person in the world) no english and from Ecuador 
• hermana roa (knows a decent amount of english hallelujah haha and shes from chile) 
• then there´s ME. bahahaha 

and so we listen to this dern cd on repeat alll day long. well obviiously not all day long cuz  were working but like we wake up at 656 and pray and then at 7on the dot we have ejercisio! and so that music is blasting and its the funniest thing in the world cuz they dont know how ridiculous the songs are but its so funny. i translated most of the songs for them so theyre learning the words bahaha tooo funy. like i guess its not that distracting when its in another language and you dont know whats going on, but like when were having companion study and its blaring SATURDAY IS A SPECIAL DAY ITS THE DAY WE GET READY FOR SUNDAY!! i cant help but smile and laugh obviously hahaha

Oh! i havent even told yall! so hno vargas of the good old ccm told us that argentinos dont use their s´s and so i was like yueah yeah and didnt really pay attention BUT THEY REALLY DONT! it really threw me off at first! and hna musmano is argentina tambien and so she doesnt either and im like WHAT! who doens´t use their s´s! S is the greatest letter in america!!! wait. maybe thats the problem. this isnt america... bahahaha and so yeah its crazy. like the word Entonces. it is like a filler word. for like then or so and so the people here say ´´tonce´´ instead of entonces! HAH QUE INICUA! bahahha also thats what hna musmano says ALL THE TIME! AHH QUE INICUA! its like oh! wicked! or like Oh! how wicked! bahaha too funny! anyway let´s get to the good stuff!

So the work! ah! greatest ever! read alma 26 and thats how i feel! for real! pause the letter and READ! I WONT LET YOU CONTINUE TIL YOU READ IT! not like im picking favorites, but its the greatest chapter! or at least very relevant and PUMPS ME UP! FOR real, i havent felt bad, sad, homesick, too tired, or anything since i got here! i love it!!!!! 

now that youve read the chapter, you can imagine that how i feel. SO AWESOME! putting in all this work cuz its worth it! putting in all this work to save a soul!!! ah! i love the gospel! and i find that everytime i speak its easy, not only because of the Holy Ghost, which this work is not possible without it cuz we ARE NOT TEACHERS OR EDUCATED RELIGIOUS EXPERTS, but because it's what i believe because it's TRUE! ive also learned to really LOVE the book of Mormon. its my favorite. ive always loved it and knew it was the word of God and really important but not its like BAM i seriously AHHH 1 hour to study it is NOT ENOUGH!  

poor hna musmano was sick this week and so friday was kinda a bust and the last half of saturday was too. we had to go back to the pension and she rested, or tried too. poor dear. ah! im running out of time! any way though it turned out to be really good experience for me though cuz i had literally 12 hours to study the book of mormon on friday! and that wasnt enough! ah! me encanta! also, im now studying solely in spanish so woop de doo! i understand for the most part everything, i just speak like a 2 year old with 3 marshmallows in their mouth. hahah seriously bahaha but it doesnt matter becuase what the investigators remember and what matters is what they feel and that´s the Spirit´s job! 

yes, that is an etch a sketch i did while hna musmano was sick
bahaha que bueno, no! hahaha tootin my own horn bahaha

so basically this work is all about dilligence. one day i think it was miercoles, but we worked SO HARD it was insane! and NOBODY WAS HOME everone was busy! hours and hours and only a few lessons!!!! but we just have to work because we witnessed the sickest miracle!!!!! we were walking back home for the night and this man stopped us. it was a dark street so i was kinda taken aback but he started talking to us and was like ´´are yall missionaries´´ and we were like SNAP CRACKLE POP YES!!! and then he was like ´´i have a book of mormon and i want to learn more and be baptized´´ LIKE WHATTTT!! 
i need to stop being surprised when things like this happen because obviously God can do anything!!!! but HOW SICK RIGHT!! we met with him once already, and ill keep you posted. hes a talker, so its hard to get stuff in, but he is searching desperately for peace in his life!!! so sick right!!!!

no, patricia didnt get baptized saturday. still waiting on her papers, but never fear! because she is very active and isn't by any means backing out! just a lesson of pacience! ah! 
i cant remember how to spell in ingles!!! hahaha

also! we havbe another baptismal date! her name is belen! shes still got a ways to go but shes awesome! and has a date for 26 de julio!!!! that was so sick! shes so curios and has been like a permanent investigator-not progressing but our lesson with her on jueves was INSANE! the spirit was like BAM SPLAT!!! love it!!! and i had this impression BAPTISM! BUT Then her mom came through the door and i was like ah is the spirit gone what do we do! cuz her mom is like a big mouth and completely distracted everybody hahaha but hna musmano continued on and asked her and she was like YES! ahhh!!! so sick! love it! this area is a little hard. so we've heard. but im not listening to that. because were just gonna work and work and 

Thy will be done right!!!!

AHHH I FORGOT TO TEL YALL THIS! so yes, we have a toilet, but no you cant flush the toilet paper. yes its gross, i know. but thats apparently the way things are. WHICH 3 LOVELY HERMANAS FROM SOUTH AMERICA DIDNT THINK TO TELL ME. so literally we just barely arrive at the pension. like barely and im like kay hermanas i gotta go. like 2 days in airplanes, i gotta go hahaha and so i went to the restroom and then the toilet water rose and i was like ahhh uhhh is this normal and hna musmano was like um no thats not normal. hahaha so im like uhhh my b. no paper in the toilet and shes like NO NO PAPER IN THE TOILET! and i was like hahah oooooops. like thats the worst in the world when you jack up a toilet, but when you need help to fix it--theres no coming back from that bahaha and so naturally we dont have a plunger. so hna musmano and hna villacis go down 2 flights of stairs for a plunger (yes we are on the 4th floor) and come back with this LITERALLy 4 -foot tall plunger bahahaa and so the funniest thing in the world was watching little hna musmano who is like 5 feet tall use this gigantore plunger! bahahhaha but, she tackled the beast, no need to fear or fret. bahahah

also did i mention its colder than africa here!!!! ahh! and also thank you sooo much for the shoes again! they are the greatest! and the tights! mom youre the greatest! 

i wrote mom a letter, and i dont know when ill be able to send it seeing as i need stamps and i dont know how to get them. welp all is well, todo bien aquí! love you all so much! 

please post the whole letter in my blog. shout out to the fans. bhahaha do i have a twitter hashtag yet? haha chiste. including the toilet story! itll make me famous! broma! 

pride is of the devil! hahaha

 paz y bendiciones!!!!